Tell of His Grace

19 But Jesus would not let him. Instead, he told him, “Go back home to your family and tell them how much the Lord has done for you and how kind he has been to you.”

20 So the man left and went all through the Ten Towns, telling what Jesus had done for him. And all who heard it were amazed.

Mark 5:19-20

Have you ever experienced God’s favour and grace and you could no longer keep it to yourself? When did you last feel really blessed? There comes a time when we receive grace in abundance that we get too excited and call everyone we can and let them know that something positive has happened in our lives. Today, when someone gets a job after a very long period of job search, they would go everywhere praising God, including on their social media status updates. Have you experienced such? The same goes for someone who gives birth to a child after a long journey of waiting and praying. In some instances, its healing that we receive.

In Mark 5, we see a man who was possessed by evil spirits and was facing a really rough and poor quality of life. He cut himself and stayed at the tombs. He wore rags and smelt awful. If you saw him today, he would probably look worse than the mentally challenged people we see in the streets. He longed for the day he would enjoy a normal life. When the Lord Jesus Christ changed His situation, he felt the urge to cling and follow Him everywhere. I wonder if God has ever done something in your life and you literally gave your life unto him and you chose to truly serve Him. He thought to himself that the best he could do was to follow Him. After all, did he have a better place to be than with the only man who saved him from so many evil spirits, so many that they drove 2,000 pigs into the sea? Wait, just imagine this. The evil spirits were able to instantly drive 2000 into the sea, what were they doing to just one man? That man must have suffered. He was now relieved and he made up his mind to follow Jesus.

On the other hand, Jesus did not want the man to just follow Him. He instead asked him to go tell his family what he had experienced! Wow! That is all that Jesus required of him. Today, brethren, Jesus wants you to witness for Him. Go and testify the good things He has done in your life. Go and speak of the gracious gift that we received on Calvary. Tell of His infinite love and grace to all. The man who was healed went and gave his testimony to the Ten Towns (Decapolis). When you truly experience His grace, you will not only testify to your family. You will be on the fire to go and tell people in the tens of towns.

Have you experienced His hand in your life? Can you tell your redemption story? Can you testify of His goodness?

May we pray.

Dearest Father above, we truly thank you for your abundant grace. Thank you for your tenderest care and for the daily miracles you keep performing in our lives. We are truly sorry for not telling of your love and grace enough times and to more of your children. Teach us to testify and for more of your children to hear of your good works and come to your fold. Protect us now and forever more, in Jesus Mighty name we pray and believe. Amen.

Don’t be too Sure about Tomorrow

1Come now, you who say, “Today or tomorrow [a]we will go to such and such a city, spend a year there, buy and sell, and make a profit”; 14 whereas you do not know what will happen tomorrow. For what is your life? It is even a vapor that appears for a little time and then vanishes away. 15 Instead you ought to say, “If the Lord wills, we shall live and do this or that.” 16 But now you boast in your arrogance. All such boasting is evil. 17 Therefore, to him who knows to do good and does not do it, to him it is sin.

James 4: 13-17, NKJV

It is our nature to think positively about tomorrow and to make plans for each coming day especially when we see that things are working to our advantage. We are however cautioned that we are not assured of the coming days because this life is short and death (sleep) is certain. No one of us knows when they will die, unless of course they are ailing from a deadly illness or take their own lives (sadly).

You remember the rich fool from Luke 12:13-21? The man planned out his life well. He garnered enough to spend/eat and enjoy life for several years, but the Lord took his soul that night. So, we thus need to be very careful and put our treasures in heaven, such that if we sleep any time from now, we know that for sure we will not miss the everlasting life when the Lord Jesus Christ comes for us. Let us live every day as if it was th last day on earth and thus do that which is required of us.

It is okay to plan for future, but we have to wholeheartedly submit to the will of God and be prepared not to miss our ultimate prize-everlasting life. Repent today, make it right with others and with God before you sleep. We can never boast of tomorrow. Most people die with plans for the next day, week or year. Let’s not lose our souls looking for the earthly riches because we may not even live to enjoy it to the fullness.

Do not boast about tomorrow, for you do not know what a day may bring.

Proverbs 27:1,NIV

Let’s pray

Almighty Father, thank you for the gift of life and health. We thank you for the sweet assurance that you hold our future and we can fully trust that it is all good and for your glory. We pray that you may take away our sinful thoughts and help us to fully trust in your will. Be with us now and always in Jesus Mighty Name. Amen

Our Role in the Fight against Racism

The recent events in relation to racism got me thinking really hard. I know that racism and favoritism do not come from our father above. I know my fellow Christians too, know that any form of discrimination is wrong in the eyes of God. I then thought, what could we do during this period? Should we keep quiet about it? Can we use this to make a difference in our small worlds? Did the Spirit lead the authors to speak about this in the Bible?

I did a little study and learned that we need to act right in order to positively contribute to the fight against racism. Below are some of the things that we can intentionally do to ensure we live according to the purpose we called to.

  1. Show genuine Love. We are called to love others as we love ourselves. This is both a command and something we should express as gratitude for God’s love. But it is easy to love those who are lovable (our friends, children, family, good looking people, the rich, etc). But this is where we fail. We sin by loving selectively. James 2:8-9 tells us this clearly. Favouritism
  2. Humble Ourselves– Humility enables us to see the value in others. It doesn’t matter whether you have more earthly wealth or you see yourself as of a superior race. There is no one who is better than the other in the Lord’s eyes. Everyone, whether Jew or Gentile, receives salvation. The book of Romans 10:12-13 tells us that For there is no difference between Jew and Gentile—the same Lord is Lord of all and richly blesses all who call on him, for, “Everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved.”. Knowing this, we should thus value everyone and give everyone a chance. Everyone has something we can gain from them. Read Phillippians 2:3-4. Let’s not do anything out of selfish ambition and self-pride. Humility
  3. Teach Our Children-Shaping our children from their childhood to know that we are all one and are all precious in the eyes of the Lord will train them to shun racism or tribalism. Children seldom leave the ways they are taught when they are young. If you keep telling teaching them to hate anyone who is not of their faith, then you fail inevitably. This is very common amongst us Christians. Weare often the most judgemental people against people who do not share our faith. This is also the root of evils related to racism. Can we teach our children that Christ died for everyone, Christian, or not Christian? We are one body. As Christians, we are tasked to change future generations by teaching this to our children. Then there will be no more prejudice in the coming days.
  4. Guard our words and mind- Speak carefully lest you speak hatred or cause others to hate. Whatever you speak comes from your heart and your thoughts. Before you speak about someone or a tribe or race, as yourself if your words bring glory and honor to God, and what emotion they will raise in the person listening to you.  Start with your thoughts. Think upon good and edifying things like we see in Philippians 4:8. If your thoughts are right, then your words and actions will be right too.

    “Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable–if anything is excellent or praiseworthy–think about such things.” Phillippians 4:8

  5. Pray– Prayer heals everything. Because we are weak as humans and are prone to temptations to be biased in our interactions with others, we pray that God strengthens us and helps us be overcomers.

Above all, we are the Light of the World. We should light the world by loving everyone equally. Otherwise, we lose sight of where we are headed. 1 John 2:11 puts it well.

But anyone who hates a brother or sister is in the darkness and walks around in the darkness. They do not know where they are going, because the darkness has blinded them. 1 John 2:11, NIV

May we pray.

Almighty Father in heaven, thank you for loving us all equally without any favoritism. Thank you for saving us from eternal death Father and for giving us the HolySpirit to walk with us and unite us. Lord, we pray that you may heal the world of this disease of discrimination, that you may pour love unto the hearts of men so that we can show the same unto fellow men. Help us to teach our children about this loving unity. Above all Father, help us, the Christians to be more loving unto all your children. May we conquer all bad thoughts, words, and actions through your mighty help, for we trust in your holy name. Amen.

She asked me not to yell!

This morning, I had just sat at my desk and was starting out my workday. Then my daughter walked up to me to show me her early morning achievement. In this house, we celebrate every small achievement. We are best friends and my sweet girl is always reminding me of this.

As usual, I hugged her tight and showered her with praises. She hugged me back, even tighter. I felt the love deeply. Then, she looked up to me and said… “But mum, please do not yell at me again like the other day.” I was shocked. I inquired further about the particular incident that she was referring to. She painted the picture so well that I just knew I did shout at her for real. Anyway, which parent here does not raise their voices when they see that their kids are not responding or doing things right? I need some coaching, please. This is a challenge.

I have had to think upon scripture to see what I can do better. Not just to my daughter but to everyone else around me. I am sure that this is something I do unconsciously but I am praying to God that He may train me every day to be humble and very gentle to others. For this is what is said in Ephesians 4:2, NLT: “Always be humble and gentle. Be patient with each other, making allowance for each other’s faults because of your love.”


Going forward, I charge myself to learn to correct others in love and with humility and gentleness. I pray that I am not a fool who vents but be wise and always hold it back (Proverbs 29:11). May Almighty God help me through this thorough patience lesson.



Where to get Funds to Start a Business

It is tough for everyone, yeah. And now, more than ever, we are all revaluating our life choices, especially on the financial side. We have had time to reflect on financial stress and I agree we all do not want to be in a crisis in the future. One sure way to do this is to get a business rolling and play your cards well. Whether you are employed or not, a business is going to help you achieve your financial freedom.  If you are employed, by now you know that a salary alone will never get you where you desire. And if you are not employed, starting a business may be wiser than doing nothing at all.

Encouraging you to start a business without capital sounds crazy, right? Ah, today, I want to remind you of where you can get funds to start your business. You may or may not have a business idea already, maybe you have thought about it for over a decade (like myself), or maybe you just thought about it now. It is okay. I will share some ideas soon for those who do not have any. For now, let’s look at the sources of funding available to us below.

  1. Grants. Be active in searching for grants for startups. It is not easy to find grants. But, it is the best source of funds for your business because you will not payback. As we all know, businesses struggle at the beginning, and paying back may be very hectic.  Some of the grants you can try are Kenya’s National Government Affirmative Action Fund (NGAAF) and other grants available for Kenyans like Acumen, African Development Foundation, and Ford Foundation among many other organizations. Be smart and tap into these opportunities. The trick is to find grants, apply in good time, and ensure you meet all requirements. If you can describe how your business will be of social good, you will have a better chance of winning the grants. In case you need help with your grant application, you can always get in touch with me.
  2. Fundraisers. Knocking doors for people to fundraise for your startup and receiving a big “NO” is better than not trying at all. Crowdsourcing  is one of the easiest ways of raising funds. You will be surprised by how many people out there will invest in your idea, provided you convince them. It is said that all money in the people’s pockets can be yours as long as you will convince them to give it to you.
  3. Chama Schemes. As Kenyans, I am sure you have heard about Chamas. These are groups with people with similar interests. Chamas are good because you pull resources together and enhance each other’s lives. When you save your money with a Chama, you can easily access loans or if you are doing a merry go round, you can get funds to start your business. You need to be cautious though when starting or joining a chama. Make sure it is registered legally and that you understand the chama constitution well. This should protect your finances. When you start a business with funds from a chama, ensure that you are reasonable about how you will repay the loan. Understanding the terms and conditions will help you when it comes to loan recovery as well.
  4. Savings. Depending on the amount needed for your startup,  you can start saving way before you start the business or use savings that you have already set aside. This is the safest source of funding since you will not have external pressure on repayment and you will have peace of mind concentrating on business performance. Though this should not be allowed to bring laxity that may lead to losses.  This source of funding is only applicable when the capital needed is attainable. It is easier for those who are already employed or in business and they can thus save. It is harder for those who do not have an income.
  5. Angel Investors. Yes, there angel investors that would love to fund startups. But you have never heard about angel investors… Well, just type angel investors in Kenya and you will find so many of them. It will be helpful to join Angel Investor Networks too.
  6. Loans and Microfinance. These are good sources when you have no other option. Make sure you look for loans that have the least or no interest. If you are a young person, you can look up the Youth Enterprise Development Fund and get loans with very low or no interest. Otherwise, shop around for the most loanee-friendly loans. Always read the terms and conditions before signing any papers and purpose to repay as soon as possible. Let your debt be good for you.

Above all, always think about what happens if your business does not pick up well and what your fall back plan would be. It is always good to plan for the worst, even as you hope for the best in business. Think about what could go wrong and how you could possibly get a bailout. For instance, if you are not able to repay your loan in a good time, do you have bargaining power with your lender to allow you some more time? What is the grace period for your loan?

Do you have any thoughts about how to fund your startup? Feel free to share in the comments sections below.

A Better Plan?

So many people struggle with trusting God’s plan. And this is very normal for us since we are human and many are times when God’s plan doesn’t seem to make any sense. There are several examples in the Bible of people, like us, who had a really hard time trusting God’s plans and took up matters into their hands. Can you name some?

This evening, I’d like us to look at one woman who did struggle. This woman is Rachael. As we already know, Jacob fell in love with Rachael and worked for Laban for 7 years in order to marry her. But, as the custom was, he had to marry Leah first since she was the older sibling and then work an additional 7 years to marry the love of life. You can imagine the joy he had when he finally married the real deal, right?  Even if he loved Rachael, he had to be a husband to both wives. And while on this, Leah bore him 4 sons whereas Rachael remained childless. This gave Leah a chance to feel so proud and feel that she was more respected. As I see it, she must have teased her sister on several occasions. In the long run, this must-have hurt Rachael so deeply on top of jealousy such that she confronted her husband. Let’s read from Genesis 30:1-2

1 When Rachel saw that she was not bearing Jacob any children, she became jealous of her sister. So she said to Jacob, “Give me children, or I’ll die!”

Jacob became angry with her and said, “Am I in the place of God, who has kept you from having children?”

Rachael knew that Jacob loved her and that the best threat she would use against her husband is her death. Jacob however, responded in a way to remind her (harshly) that it was God who gave children.

This did not stop Rachael from taking the matters into her hands. She gave Jacob her maid, Bilhah, and asked him to sleep with her and bear a son for her. This is now Bilhah bore two sons, Dan and Naphtali (read vs 5-8). To her, she was satisfied that this was God’s plan of blessing her with children. In fact, she says that God has judged in her favor! She thought that she had now won the war against her sister. The story goes on about the competitions between Leah and Rachael. Leah too gave her maid, Zilpah, who bore two sons. Leah gave birth to 6 sons and one daughter, while on the race.

How many times in our lives have we taken matters to our hands? When looking for a job, we see that God is not working as fast as we want and we take a step to bribe someone from that job? That at times we do not bear children when we badly want them that we go to the extent of seeking help from the world without involving God? We forget that no matter how much fertility drugs we take, God has the final say? We may want quick wealth and end up being corrupt. But we need to be reminded that God has a better plan than we think.

Now, just imagine that after Rachael gave her maid to Jacob, God still blessed her with her own sons! Let’s read Genesis 30:22-24

22 Then God remembered Rachel; he listened to her and enabled her to conceive. 23 She became pregnant and gave birth to a son and said, “God has taken away my disgrace.” 24 She named him Joseph,[a] and said, “May the Lord add to me another son.”

So eventually God opened Rachael’s womb! Are you sitting there thinking that God has forgotten you? Relax, God got your back. He is coming. You do not need to assist Him. You don’t have to give Him options. Yes, He may not have given you a marriage partner. Just wait upon Him. He will work it out for you. Don’t be too desperate to the extend of ‘giving your maid to your husband’!

Control and comparison often work together seamlessly to infiltrate our hearts. Once we see someone else with something we want, we find a way to make it happen, even if it’s not God’s plan for us.  But we can rejoice today in the truth of Isaiah 55:8, “‘For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,’ declares the Lord.” If our situation looks impossible, we can believe this promise. When I trust God with everything, His plans for my life will prevail.

“Heavenly Father, forgive our mistrust in your plans and your will. Help us to trust you more each day and to wait upon you. Soften our hearts and rule our minds. In Jesus’ Mighty Name we pray.” Amen


No Fear

Our Scripture reading today will come from Psalms 23. And with a special focus on Verse 4.


This chapter is very very common. We often recite it and maybe in some instances, without thinking deeper about it. Now that most of us memorize the words, how much do we refer to the words when we are in times of trouble?

In one way or another, we find ourselves experiencing a dark valley.  And this is the time we yarn for the good shepherd, Jesus, to be with us. Jesus is the shepherd who leads us to comfortable places, refreshes our souls and lavishes us with love and blessings. When we are deeply disappointed, He, our protector, always comes to help and comfort us.

There are times that we are faced with a lot of time, probably due to sickness, injuries from accidents. Even these times when we are in the valleys of death, we shouldn’t be afraid because the caring Shepherd is with us. He doesn’t slumber or even blink for a second. During hard times, when fighting pain, loss, stress, depression, etc, we find comfort in Psalms 23. Here we find blessed assurance that our God is with us and He cares. There is no need to feel afraid.

Throughout the Bible, we are reminded more than 365 times, not to fear.  God promises us that He will be with us. See Deuteronomy 31:6. We are assured, “Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you”

Brethren, let’s not be afraid of any evil or harm. Our Creator has promised to stick with us, even when we walk through the shadows and valleys of death.


Thank you, Lord, for the sweet consolation an assurance that you are with us through our difficult moments. You know us well, and that often, fear grips us and clouds our minds when we face shadows and dark valleys of life. But Lord, today and always, keep reminding us of your promises, lead us and protect us. We surrender to your will, now and forevermore.


Wanna know my 2020 Resolutions?

Praise the Lord!

We have seen the new year 2020 and we thank the Almighty for it in all things!

When I was younger, I used to write my goals and resolutions every year and often, I used to go over the lists to assess how far I was. At some point though, I would lose touch and just live. The list used to be quite long and detailed.

Now that I am older, and with so many responsibilities, I tend to just have one or two major goals and one resolution and live with the end in mind. And I have come to realize that having few items in mind makes it easier to achieve that a long cumbersome list.

What are you doing yourself? What works for you?

This year, my one resolution is to join the 5am club. I feel like I would do more by waking up early so that I can do more with my life. Why I am loving this resolution is because it will push me to do many things that I have always wished to do but couldn’t because I am usually a busy bee. I will have time to read more, blog more, pray more, do charity work, DECLUTTER and mind my business. I will also get time to exercise and thus keep myself healthy. It is the first time I am making this resolution and I’m making it publicly. I hope to uphold this and see a great deal of difference by the end of the year. I am calling this the Grace Year.

Feel free to let me know about your goals and resolutions if you have. Above all, let us remember to pray for each other. Let’s put all our plans in His hands because He has the final word. See Proverbs 16:1 “To humans belong the plans of the heart, but from the LORD comes the proper answer of the tongue.




Is it His Will?

This week, I was traveling to Nairobi. I did not find a ticket on my usual bus and thus, I got a different bus. Before leaving the house, I prayed and asked for journey mercies and above all, for God’s will to be done. As I was leaving, I told my husband that my plan was to get to Nairobi by 4am, go to the house, take a nap for about two hours and then get ready to leave for a meeting at 8am. I left and knew that as always, that is how my trip was going to happen. As we journeyed on, I realized that the bus was extraordinarily slow! We arrive at Narok at 3am…There was no way we could get to Nairobi in an hours time. I recalculated in my head that since Nairobi is always three hours away, we could still arrive by 6.30am and I would just forgo my nap but everything else to go as planned. Shock on me! We arrived at 8.20am… Already late for the meeting. I had to find another way to quickly freshen up and head for the meeting (I requested to reschedule the meeting for 9.00am). It was very easy to get angered and quarrel with the driver or the bus management team. But I held my cool and thanked God for a safe travel. Since the bus seemed to have had a mechanical issue, it could have been a worse journey than it was.

This got me thinking. When I prayed for God’s will over the journey, did I really mean it? Was I ready to have my plans altered for His to prevail? We often pray and mention these words but it is usually not easy to take His will positively. Jesus taught us in Matthew 6:10 to pray this, “your kingdom come, your will be done on earth as it is in heaven..” I come today to encourage each and every one of us to trust that what comes from heaven is greater and better than we want or plan.

Jeremiah 29:11 is one of the most quoted and loved verses.

Jer 29 vs 11

God promises that His plans are perfect for us. All we need to do is to let our hearts to trust that the Plans of God are perfect plans. We need to know that His plans are always better than ours. That they are plans that will prosper us, will not harm us and will give us hope.

I know we make plans, and it is goldly to make plans, but we must always surrender our plans to Him and I mean to surrender them completely. We do have our hopes and we pray for something to go our way. As Christians, it is always to give ourselves room to expect something better from God. Even if it may look bad in our eyes, it is always with good intentions. I know at times God’s plans don’t make sense at all. But we have to trust Him. I remember well last year, when I learnt that my dad had been involved in an accident, I kept praying for my will to be done. “God, please let’s find him alive and take him to XX hospital”. I personally repeated this for almost ten hours as we searched for him. I asked all prayer warriors I knew to pray for the same. It wasn’t His will. By the time we found my dad, he had been dead for 15 hours. How could you say that His will was perfect?  We just believe that it was. We don’t know why He let it happen, but we leave it in His hands and now present our wounded hearts to him to bandage and heal.

Beloved, what plans do you have for today, tomorrow, next week, Christmas or next year? Have you completely surrendered the plans to God for perfection? Do you remember that as much as we plan, God has the final say as it is written in Proverbs 16:1 and Proverbs 19:21?

As believers, let’s open our hearts for His will to prevail.

Three Ways I am Coping with Grief

As you may know by now, I lost my father last year in October and today marks exactly one year since we laid him to rest.

I have learnt so many lessons in the past thirteen months and most importantly about grief. I have taken every day as it came and used different coping mechanisms depending on what seemed the most appropriate. However, three of the coping tips have been helpful in a couple of instances and I have thought it wise to share them in this article. Coolest Dad

  1. Allowing myself to cry it out. I think this has been the my safest place. When I am clouded with a heavy heart and can’t stop feeling too low and my eyes are stung by bitter tears, I let them out freely. During the first several weeks after my father’s departure, there were so many people telling me not to cry, and to be strong for the rest of my family. But I totally wasn’t able to hold it. I wasn’t strong for myself, how could I be strong for others? It totally didn’t make sense to me at all. Yes, I would hide sometimes to cry, but mostly, I let myself be as vulnerable as I was. I did not see any way I could live a lie.  Over the months, of course it has been easier to stand up for mum and siblings where I can, but that hasn’t stopped me to nurse my own grief. So whenever I have to let tears flow, I do so and thereafter, I come back to  my usual duties. The body has it’s clock which I appreciate and when it says it is time to cry, I cannot force it to do other things. Letting out feelings in tears makes the hearts feel a little lighter,even thought wounded.
  2. Listening to Music. Music heals the soul. Every heartbreak and heartache for me calls for some music. Mostly instrumentals, other times just worship. There is some peace creeps in with every piece I listen to and by the time I am an hour in, I feel much better. I can be listening while I do other things,or just sit or lie on my bed to feel the moment. Does music bring some healing to you? If it does,then great! Listen to more of it when you feel down.
  3. Thinking about beautiful memories with Dad. As soon as I start thinking about how good a father dad was to us,all the sacrifices he made and everything we did together, I feel thankful for having had a great dad for 27 years. I find myself in between smiles and tears of missing him. I think upon the last twelve months of his life and how we had meetings in my home town, sometimes having nothing much to talk about and other times talking about great things that could change the world forever. I cherish all he did and I acknowledge that he was responsible for who I became. I don’t take it for granted. I know there are others who have had absentee fathers,yet my dad was not absent for a second. He had a way of showing his love no matter the situation. I know at one point, we had a difficult time,whereby we did not agree on a decision I had made. Any father,in his shoes,would have given up on me. But dad, full of heavenly love, still had the guts to sit me down, and tell me that he loves me no matter the situation and that it is the decision that he had issues with and not me. That really melted my heart. Thinking about dad’s life, I feel strengthened to live upon the principles he taught me- the chief being priceless love. Loving others makes life worthwhile. he taught me the importance of living a simple life. He taught me to respect others and to work hard. Remembering this and more makes me smile.Dad did a wonderful job as a father and shepherd. I live to celebrate him.

What I can now confidently say, is that grief has no formula. It varies from person to person and even from moment to moment. The way you would mourn the loss of a parent is not the same way you would a spouse,child or friend. And the way you feel today is not the say way you would feel tomorrow about your loss. If you find yourself in a situation whereby you just want to close yourself up and cry for an hour or so, go ahead and just do that. You will feel better. For others,it would be to sing or to write or play a music instrument. Find your safe place each day. Taking each day at a time. I trust that with time, you will learn to live with the pain. I’m in the process of learning too. And some people heal quite fast and move on to other things. If you find yourself that you are taking much longer, don’t beat yourself up. Your time will come. It is okay not to be okay. Don’t pretend or assume your pain. Suppressing the feelings can only make it worse.

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